By Steven Reiss
What will we wish? What makes us tick? From attractiveness to vengeance to interest, this booklet explains the sixteen easy and common wants that form our behavior—and exhibits how the methods we prioritize them determines our personalities. Grounded in updated mental learn, this e-book can help
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Extra info for Who Am I? The 16 Basic Desires That Motivate Our Actions and Define Our Personalities
In general, anxiety-ridden companions are burdensome to tranquil companions. YOUR accomplice and also you: SHARED AND COMPETING pursuits The approach of sixteen wishes will help overview the components within which you and your accomplice are alike or diverse. utilizing the connection worksheet under, input the sixteen wish rankings for every accomplice. for each query you/your associate spoke back with: Please input under: extremely important regular value less significant + zero – less than the column referred to as “Goal,” write an S for “shared” subsequent to every pair of wishes rated both (+, +) or (–, –). Write a C for “competing” subsequent to every pair of wants marked both (+, =) or (–, +). Write an N for “not a significant factor” subsequent to every last pair of wishes. those should be pairs with a + or – from one companion and no ranking from the opposite. R e l a t i o n s h i p Wo r okay s h e e t persistent Independence interest instance: Joe and Linda Joe Linda aim + + S _____ _____ _____ zero zero N _____ _____ _____ zero zero N _____ _____ _____ 156 Your rankings You Your accomplice target _____ _____ _____ _____ _____ _____ _____ _____ _____ HOW RELATIONSHIPS develop R e l a t i o n s h i p Wo r okay s h e e t (continued) instance: Joe and Linda Joe Linda aim popularity _____ _____ _____ zero zero N Order _____ _____ _____ zero zero N Saving _____ _____ _____ – – S Honor _____ _____ _____ – zero N Idealism _____ _____ _____ zero zero N Social touch _____ _____ _____ + – C kin _____ _____ _____ + zero N + + prestige _____ _____ _____ S Vengeance _____ _____ _____ zero zero N Romance _____ _____ _____ zero zero N consuming _____ _____ _____ – zero N actual job _____ _____ _____ + zero N Tranquility _____ _____ _____ zero zero N Your scores You Your associate objective _____ _____ _____ _____ _____ _____ _____ _____ _____ _____ _____ _____ _____ _____ _____ _____ _____ _____ _____ _____ _____ _____ _____ _____ _____ _____ _____ _____ _____ _____ _____ _____ _____ _____ _____ _____ _____ _____ _____ ultimately, graph your solutions on web page 158. for every S hope, position a dot on the point indicated through “shared pursuits. ” for every C wish, position a dot on the point indicated by means of “competing ambitions. ” For all different wishes, position a dot on the heart point categorized “not an element. ” easy methods to INTERPRET THE GRAPH An “S” exhibits that you simply and your companion percentage comparable pursuits with reference to the actual hope. this can be a resource of mutual allure on your courting. A “C” exhibits that you simply and your associate have signiﬁcantly diversified objectives in regards to a specific wish. it is a capability resource of repeated quarreling on your dating. An “N” exhibits specific wish may not be a major mental consider your dating. instance strength, saving, and standing signify shared objectives in Joe and Linda’s courting. they're either bold (indicating a hope for power), they either prefer to spend funds, and they might either wish to stay in prestigious 157 HOW the elemental wants ARE happy JOE AND LINDA’S dating GRAPH Shared targets (S) now not an element (N) Competing targets (C) | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Independence | reputation | | Idealism | | Vengeance | | Tranquility Saving family members consuming strength interest Order Honor Social touch prestige Romance actual job MY dating GRAPH Shared ambitions (S) no longer an element (N) Competing pursuits (C) | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Independence | reputation | | Idealism | | Vengeance | | Tranquility Saving relations consuming strength interest Order Honor Social touch prestige Romance actual task 158 HOW RELATIONSHIPS develop neighborhoods and purchase dear vehicles.
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